I hear it in the night, the palest noise: drip, drip, drip. Of course I know what it is—we all do—that familiar sound of a leaky faucet. It is so quiet, so benign, and yet it has the power to steal my attention and make me squirm in my bed. In its syncopated rhythm nestles at least a hundred dollars in expenses.
In the morning I rise and verify that indeed my bathtub faucet is leaking. I call my plumber Charlie and make an appointment for him to fix it. As I work, cook meals, take a walk and sleep, my mind returns to that leak, and when it does I feel the discomfort of having to send money down the drain, especially during this time when my job is leaking away drip by drip, and my future is so uncertain. Each time I catch my attention dwelling there I bring it back to the Beloved and feel my whole being calm.
When Charlie arrives and begins pulling off the faucets, the fear and dread again return. I pace the house in anticipation. What if the problem is larger than the leak? Always that possibility lurks.
But I call on the Courageous One and stop my fearful movement. I look out the window at the clear, sunny sky and feel a lightness come within my being. It is gratitude I feel for Charlie—a master plumber and kind soul. I’m also grateful that today I have the funds to pay him. When he finishes fixing the leak—that’s all it was—I write the check and hand it to him. A rush of elation fills me as I recognize that in this moment I am the love flow.
I say goodbye to Charlie and I head out on a walk. As I step down the trail through the piñon forest, the Beloved expands this contemplation to show me that I don’t have money. Instead, my job each day is to flow love, energy and money to the cosmos. If I believe that I own wealth, that is a fixed notion—it is a concept of the mind, and the mind wants to own everything.
I actually own nothing. All in my possession—my house, car, computer and the cash in my bank account—belong to the Divine. I am simply using those things. I smile and a spring comes to my step as I see that I have nothing to lose, literally, since I own nothing.
Now, whenever I feel fearful about money, I know it is a cue from the Infinite to re-center my attention on the love right here, right now. Everything is created in the present moment. It is not that I forget completely about my finances. I balance my checkbook and pay my bills on time. I simply don’t rely on money for safety.
As I gaze at the sapphire sky, I see a new Lesley. Whenever called upon to pay anything, I do so with love. Whatever I am asked to give, whether love to my family, energy to work, or money to the plumber, I do so with gratitude. My true wealth is my Soul—that is what I nurture. That is all that deserves my attention. And everything flows from It.