This week, a man—I’ll call him Dave—asked me out on a date—to tea, anyway. We talked about our work, our life passions, our friendships. The next day, he called to tell me what a nice time he’d had. He wanted to get together again. Sure, I said. Let’s do that. But after I hung up, I stalled like an engineless plane in mid-air.
Yes, he was nice, successful, and we’ve been acquaintances for years, so I know he’s not an ax murderer. But I had to check to see if he passed the “Hell yes test.”
The “Hell yes test,” actually coined the “Hell yeah test” by the brilliant entrepreneur Derek Sivers (http://sivers.org), suggests that when faced with an activity, if you don’t say “Hell yes, I want to do it!” then don’t bother.
When Dave called again, I politely declined his invitation to go out because I was lukewarm about the idea. Sure, I could have gone and started up a new friendship, but…why?
More and more I find that as I keep my attention on what engages me completely, the less I want to put my attention on the lukewarm things. That doesn’t mean that I quit my current work or stop helping friends and relatives in need when those activities become challenging or dull. But it does mean that as can keep directing my attention toward those things I’m most passionate about, day by day, all transforms into one big “Hell Yes!”
I think it's great that you are honoring yourself and focusing more and more on what feeds you instead of what is just okay for you. That definitely makes more room for lots more "hell yeses." Wonderful! 🙂
Hi Lesley,I think it's great that you give yourself permission to invest in that which you are passionate about and pass on the luke warm attractions/invitations. I often encounter luke warm attractions/invitations and sometimes feel obligated to comply, but when I don't force myself to just go along with the program and instead choose to honor my inner knowingness, I feel very happy. :-)Thank you for your posts. They are touching, inspiring and purposeful.Much love,Jamie
Lovely story, Lesley. My outer life gets more and more narrow as I pass up the things that don’t evoke that Hell, Yes! response, and my inner life gets deeper and richer. How blessed we are!!
Lesley, I love this! Soooo simple and so true!! Thanks for linking this story from your most recent post “I am the creator.” Did I like your post? Thats a big hell yes!
Hell yes! I like your comment too, Luke. When I wrote the Hell Yes Test, I at times felt it was too black and white, but I really did use it when I confronted my ambivalence about the project I spoke of in I Am the Creator. When I realized that my inner was actually saying “Hell No,” to that project, I knew I had to pay attention.