The Beloved’s Playlist

I awaken with a quiet lethargy. It tugs at me like a lead weight pulling me deep into the ocean. But I rise from my bed, do my spiritual practice, and head into the world.

I drive to the grocery store, and on the way, the weight bears down again. After a week of restless sleep and some health problems, I’m tired. For days I’ve been trying to find the courage to take the next step in my creation. In the upcoming weeks I will begin teaching two sections of my writing course. I have technology to learn and new souls to meet.

Today I don’t want to participate in my life, much less be the master of it.

As I drive I recognize this negative trap for what it is: a trick of the mind to keep me down. I call on my Beloved. Immediately I get the nudge to turn on the radio. From it comes a song I’ve never heard by the New York City indie band Fun:

If you’re lost and alone

And sinking like a stone

Carry on.

May your past be the sound

Of your feet upon the ground

Carry on.

I park the car and say, “Yes, I can carry on!”

I grab my bags and water jugs and step into the store.

In the produce section, I pick up blueberries, spinach, jicama and asparagus. Then I make my way to the bulk-food area.

While I select Turkish figs, the weight comes again. I am en route for a day of service to my mother, and yet I’m having trouble even serving myself. Again I call on the Beloved, and suddenly over the Whole Foods speaker comes Bill Withers singing “Lean on Me.”

Sometimes in our lives

We all have pain

We all have sorrow

But if we are wise

We know that there’s always tomorrow


Lean on me

When you’re not strong

And I’ll be your friend

I’ll help you carry on

Tears well in my eyes and drip onto my figs. I wipe my face on my sleeve, take a deep breath, and head to the meat counter.

The song provides solace, so I can give a genuine smile and thanks to the butcher who wraps my chicken. And I continue to hear the melody as I fill my water bottles and check out at the register.

While I drive to my mother’s house, I realize I can meet today’s challenge. I can make breakfast, feed and walk the dog, do the accounting.

I can give love.

And suddenly over the radio comes boy band One Direction singing “What Makes You Beautiful.”

Everyone else in the room can see it

Everyone else but you

The way you light up the room like nobody else

The way you flip your hair gets me overwhelmed

But when you smile at the ground it ain’t hard to tell

You don’t know oh-ho

You don’t know you’re beautiful.

That’s what makes you beautiful.

Corny, definitely, but I’m reminded that I am beautiful inside, where it counts. I turn off the radio and listen to the silence while I make my way up a hill and park in front of my mother’s house.

In the silence, the true Sound rushes in, filling me with love. It ‘s like floating on cloud high above all. Goosebumps cover my skin and smile stretches across my face.

As I walk up the path to the house, my recent favorite song comes into my head: “Ho Hey” by the Lumineers:

I belong with you

You belong with me

You’re my sweet heart

I recognize that it’s true, I do belong to my Beloved, and It belongs to me. When I love this true self, all the energy and power I need manifest.

When I open the door, I’m happily singing.

I belong with you

You belong with me

You’re my sweet . . .

Ho hey, Ho hey

The Beloved provides the song until I know the tune and can sing it to the world.

My day of service?

A total love-fest.


The songs:

Happy Valentine’s Day!



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35 Responses to “The Beloved’s Playlist”

  1. Richard February 14, 2013 at 7:24 am #

    You’ve provided me with a lovely and loving way to begin Valentine’s Day. What an astonishing “playlist.” Thank you, Lesley…

    • Lesley February 14, 2013 at 1:51 pm #

      I’m happy to hear you enjoyed it, my fellow Aquarian. It was a fun playlist to have arrive at the door of my consciousness, and then deliver to yours. Blessings to you, dear soul.

  2. Rudy Anderson February 14, 2013 at 7:27 am #

    I simply love this little exposure. It is sweet, intimate and filled with truth. Your walk from the dragging pull of mind wanting a “break” to the bright determination and ultimate love for the life you are given is marvelous. How beautiful to witness that every thing and everything in our lives are lessons tailored and gifted to us. Turning to the Master allows those lessons to shine through. Inside beauty is everywhere we look, if we allow the scales to fall from our eyes and see the radiance within. Yours shines like a beacon! What a lovely lesson on this Love-ly day. Many blessings!

    • Lesley February 14, 2013 at 1:53 pm #

      Thank you, Rudy. You have such a poetic way with words. Yes, when we enter that “bright determination” we truly are being the Master of our creation. It is such a profound and empowered place, with the love streaming through us, lighting the world. Yay!

  3. Sherri Ohnemus February 14, 2013 at 7:50 am #

    There are truly no words except Thank you!

    • Lesley February 14, 2013 at 1:54 pm #

      You are welcome, Sherri. I am so enjoying getting to know you and see your beauty shine.

  4. Thomas Reidy February 14, 2013 at 8:29 am #

    Love, Truth and Beauty

    • Lesley February 14, 2013 at 1:55 pm #

      Thank you, Thomas. You have a way of distilling all down to the espresso of truth. That is beautiful, as are you.

  5. al February 14, 2013 at 8:40 am #

    What amazes me about your life exposure, Lesley, is your ability to remember these small and synchronous events, record them and then convey some spiritual sense in words to us. Very cool, very hip, very SOOOOOOUUUUUUULLLLLL!!

    • Lesley February 14, 2013 at 1:57 pm #

      You make me smile, Al. How great to hear that what I do here is very cool, very hip and SOUL. Truly, it is the Beloved working through me. I just do my best to listen and then play the tune as best I can by ear. But of course as a musician, you know all about that.

  6. Michael D. Baggetta February 14, 2013 at 9:46 am #

    Hi Lesley, as I was reading your post I felt like it was me at times in so many ways! I just listened to the Masters tapes on the “Shadow” and your experience helped me to see that it is not just me! That shadow or Tamas that always seems to be there trying to stop my ascent inward and upward is Kal trying to stop us all from going home! It is amazing how certain songs can be there just when we need them and now that I have read your post just as I was listening the the Shadow tapes, your channeling is a true blessing to me! Thank you for everything you so wonderfully share and channel on this wonderful website of yours. Happy Valentines Day!!!!

    • Lesley February 17, 2013 at 10:21 am #

      Thank you, Michael. What you say is beautiful. Truly, the shadow is always there waiting to trip us up, just as the Beloved is always there to keep us centered in love. The only question is, Which song do we “listen” to?

  7. Debbie February 14, 2013 at 10:24 am #

    beautiful and thank you

    • Lesley February 14, 2013 at 1:58 pm #

      You are welcome, Debbie. Thank you for reading and joining in the conversation!

  8. nelson denman February 14, 2013 at 10:55 am #

    Happy Valentines Day!

    Thanks you Lesley!

  9. Ron February 14, 2013 at 12:02 pm #

    Lesley, You are such a sweetie. My heart opens as you share your journey.

    • Lesley February 14, 2013 at 2:15 pm #

      Thank you, Ron. I’m so happy to see you here, and to touch your heart. What a blessing you are to us all.

  10. Alice Chan February 14, 2013 at 12:13 pm #

    This is great, Lesley! Thank you for sharing from your heart so authentically. I often hear songs when I need just the right “answer” or a boost, so I can so relate to your experience. We all have low-energy days, so reading about yours and how you kept going to the Divine is beautiful. Thank you, Alice

    • Lesley February 14, 2013 at 2:00 pm #

      Alice, from what I see of you on Facebook, you always seem inspired, but I guess you are right, we all at times do have those days. Lately I’ve come to accept them more as times when I am processing something so deep my mind sort of shuts off. Often they are followed by a great burst of brilliance.

  11. Mimi Shannon February 14, 2013 at 12:18 pm #

    So sweet. So simple. So true. From song to song always channeling to the heart just what we need. Thank you. XXOO

    • Lesley February 14, 2013 at 2:01 pm #

      Yes, Mimi, beautifully said. We do get exactly what we need. All we have to do is open our hearts to hear the music.

  12. karina February 14, 2013 at 12:22 pm #

    The Master is simply and awesome conductor, as you remind me so beautifully with your post.

    Keep on Loving Big and letting that old lethargy die gracefully so to speak.

    • Lesley February 14, 2013 at 2:03 pm #

      Beautifully said, Karina. It brings a smile to my face. Loving Big is a fabulous goal. I may quote you on that on Facebook.

  13. Laurie Eastland February 14, 2013 at 1:15 pm #

    Lesley, the way you put things is very “every man” and for that I am appreciative as it allows me to see how all the things, events, occurances, actions, observances, even the “no things” are the very gifts we want and need to carry on! That you have been receptive to the songs that were played for you today was awesome! Happy Valentines Day beautiful Soul! xoxo

    • Lesley February 14, 2013 at 2:07 pm #

      Thank you, Laurie. I love that “every man” notion. This post was so fun for me to write. After tromping all over this globe to make a living as a travel writer, I was thrilled to get to write about a trip to the grocery store. Boy do I enjoy my new job!

      And you make a profound point about receptivity. Spirituality really is about learning to receive the love from on high. It is so very easy when we surrender to it.

  14. Susan Stoffer February 15, 2013 at 10:06 am #

    So simple & so profound ! Enjoyed your spiritual trip to the grocery store…a travel trip that we all make in our days with our Beloved. The journey continues…no passport needed…no special airports to run thru…the spiritual journey takes us to wherever we need to be in quite the timely fashion ! Thank you for once again allowing us into the experience that truly delivers truth !

    • Lesley February 17, 2013 at 10:14 am #

      I love what you say, Susan. Truly when we are with the Beloved, every experience becomes an adventure. We are so blessed!

  15. Logan Jo'el February 15, 2013 at 10:30 am #

    You are a great hit yourself dear Lesley. I am always amazed at how you co-work so brilliantly with The Beloved and spin out such Lovely work.
    Interestingly while I was working to update our new home my spouse would turn on the radio at times (she said it was to quiet, I’d look over and smile) and I heard all these songs, with the exception of “Lean on me”, I want to say I heard it however I’m not sure, you can imagine how one can lose one self while focused in The Love you so eloquently speak of ;-), and it could have been years ago I heard it and not while working in the home, but within the moment are so many years.
    One of my daughters favorite songs is “Ho, Hey” by the Lumineers and she will place her face close to mine and sing it…at least the main chorus line.
    Thank you for your blog this week, I was struck with an arrow in my memory (whats left of it) of when a God-Man I Love dearly said “you know, we are all one big happy family up stairs”
    Con El Amor del Mar Divino, Bendiciones Carino. 🙂 <3

    • Lesley February 17, 2013 at 10:28 am #

      Logan, you say so much in this brief piece of writing, just as you do in your poetry! I love the image of your daughter putting her face up to yours and singing Ho Hey. When I listen to this song I think of all of us students of the Divine surrounding our Beloved and singing this. We are a happy family upstairs, indeed. And the “Amor del Mar Divino,” yes, that is the ocean I swim in every moment I am graced.

  16. leslie mason February 15, 2013 at 2:16 pm #

    Dear Lesley,
    You infuse the mundane with the Grace of the Master. That you choose to share such personal and intimate thoughts and feelings to encourage and inspire us is an incredible and precious gift. I know that any time I see your name attached to a post, I am in for a burst of Shabda. Thank you for blessing my day with what you share.

    • Lesley February 17, 2013 at 10:15 am #

      I am so happy, Leslie, that you get that burst of Shabda from this blog. Truly I do my best to open to the Sound and deliver it in as sweet a way as I can. All is graced by our Beloved.

  17. Jamie February 15, 2013 at 6:34 pm #

    Lesley, your simple moments are never simple, they are profound. I love how present you are with what is real. You so clearly see the gifts in every moment. You demonstrate how to live the life. You carry on through all things, you lean on the Master when you’re not strong, you allow Him to show you how beautiful you are. You belong to Him and He belongs to you. It’s just that simple and oh so sweet. 🙂

    • Lesley February 17, 2013 at 10:17 am #

      Jamie, that you for reminding me of those lyrics. I belong to you, you belong to me… Isn’t that the very core of our journey, to belong to the great creative force that is Us? You are definitely seeing a beautiful reflection of yourself, dear friend.

  18. Cynthia February 16, 2013 at 1:52 pm #

    The Beloved often sends songs to keep me “tuned” in , how blessed we cannot really know. Let’s keep listening.

    • Lesley February 17, 2013 at 10:18 am #

      I’m glad you receive those song nudges too, Cynthia. They are precious. And yes, let’s keep listening!

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